Ask Dr Nicki: My Dream or My Day-Job?

Once a week I present this feature called, "Ask Dr. Nicki" featuring a question that either a) I generate myself from commonly asked questions, or b) a question that somebody submits to me. I really hope that each and every one of you gets something from my advice!


Dear Dr. Nicki,

I am working a dead end job which I hate and is nowhere near what I want to be doing with my life. But I am afraid to quit my job and lose that financial security to follow my passion. But I've always heard that the most successful people have done just that. How do I muster the strength to quit my job and start going after my dreams?


Dr. Nicki says:

Dear Dreamer:

How terrific that you know what you're wanting to pursue-- that you appreciate the passion that drives you. Of course, stability and security are also important. Actually, very often without a certain measure of stability our passion tends to flag.

I'd like to assume that you are already pursuing that passion of yours besides doing your "day job"! Are you? This is the trick. To make sure if you're, for instance, a writer -- that you carve out time each day or at least each week to write. Or fix cars. Or plant your garden. There is always time to do what we most want to do if we make it a true priority.

Now, many use "work" as an excuse for refusing to further passion. "I'm too tired, too played out, too whatever after working all week." Nonsense. I wrote my first book and everything ever since while handling a full therapy practice. I was driven to do so because I LOVE writing.

The lovely Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray Love) in her book Big Magic talks about keeping her day job all during her first three published books -- even when she was nominated for a National Book Award!

While reading this I bet you've already come up with numerous reasons why your case is different. I'm telling you it's not.

The solution then is: keep your security in tact for now so that doesn't need to go onto the list of reasons to feel beleaguered and victimized while pursuing your true love. Go back to school or start the project near and dear to your heart or meet with others who might want to collaborate with your dreams or whatever. In other words: GET STARTED RIGHT NOW! Don't wait for lightening to strike or the moon to leave retrograde or winning the lottery or whatever other perfect circumstance you envision. Do it now. Life is in progress.

Faithfully, Dr. Nicki

To get YOUR questions answered please submit to: drnicki@stucknomore.com

Feel free to submit anonymously or by name.