From the Brain of Dr. Nicki: Black Out or Get Out!

I sat stunned as my lovely twenty-four year old client regaled me with what is apparently today’s most popular joy ride: Black out or get out! The idea, as the phrase reports, is to purposefully, consciously (if that word in any sense can be at all included in this article) drink ‘til you…well, yes, you guessed it…black out. Intentionally. Black. Out. It’s considered an achievement. Failure means being an under-achiever.

Listening, I must pause to breathe a few hundred times. My mouth has dropped into agape. My mind is swishing thoughts, like a hand-beater frantically trying to create hearty meringue. “Really?” is all I can first manage. “How old are these participants usually?” “Probably 18 to 28,” she responds. What can I say? Nothing.

Now, in my day (sounding older by the word), blacking out was the unintended consequence of, well, what we considered having a good time. Guess that part hasn’t changed much. Am I condescending when I say, though, there’s a big difference between unintended and intentional? Perhaps. Still, I stand by it!

What’s happening in the world? Are we really so very devoid of inspiration and so underserved when it comes to direction that we’ve turned into a society that counts going unconscious as a viable objective? Symptoms of pandemic lack of consciousness: constant texting; memes replacing pithy words; snapchat replacing real conversation; public displays replacing intimate experiences; diatribe replacing dialogue.

I’m saddened by it all. I buoy myself up by recognizing the increased calls to action in many corners; the growing societal outreach towards a more profound understanding of how the universe works; the generous, opened-hearted conversations I get to engage; the expanding efforts by “millennial” folk to service community; and mostly, by my own long-time awareness that life is a series of undulations, which means this too shall pass.

Still, black-out-or-get-out feels like a dismal turn of events. I can’t help thinking if only…if only…if only education were more fun and teachers were better compensated; if only reading was promoted more by the “influencers” than shopping; if only becoming an adult was understood for what it really means: (ad) going towards an (ult)ultimate state of being, which actually equals freedom. Yes, adulthood is freedom not loss of such. Surprise! And certainly being an adult must encourage more consciousness not less, right?!

Climbing down from my scraped and battered soapbox I shall end with this: we need new definitions of fun. My definition: Being present in all my experiences. What’s yours?