From the Brain of Dr. Nicki: Aging… More or Less!

Age is a funny thing. We never really, exactly feel it. When we’re young, we feel eternal. As we get "grown-up" we often complain time is passing us by. What we really mean is, life is passing us by. We’re not where we should be, we moan. We haven’t accomplished intended goals, we grouse.

Indeed, age is a funny thing. The older we get the less we seem able to step into “feeling it”! Time appears to stop. “I don’t feel 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80!” In fact, I’ve never met anyone who says: "Yes, I feel exactly the age I am!"

Of course, when it comes to actual aging, our body reminds us. Aching where it never did. Rudely stretching with certain stealth towards earth. Showing up in the mirror as a surprise guest. We brace against it. Exercise it strong. Cream it soft. Batter it beautiful. Still, it is what it is. We are as old as we are. Delusions and illusions aside, we are as old as we are. Time has passed. Acceptance is essential.

But still….age is a funny thing because time is….ungraspable. When we're sitting in our car, or having an intense chat with a friend, or hunkering down on a new project, time slips away or moves at an agonizing crawl. A minute feels like a day or a week feels like a flash. The years dissolve mysteriously, like the magician’s rabbit. We’re left hanging, wondering what happened.

So how can we avoid dropping into the Collective rejection of the aging process, while maintaining reverence for it, and at the same time hold onto our relationship to a buoyant, hopeful, enlivened perspective of life?

The solution, as with most things, is: stay awake! Keep your mind and heart open. Invite adventure. Allow new experiences to inform you. Express curiosity. Embrace change. Get out of old habits. Explore fresh avenues.

You can try these things in little ways: take a different route to work; alter your morning routine. Or you can throw cold water on your life in bigger ways: read a book entirely out of your usual wheelhouse; dialogue with someone who believes the opposite of what you believe and be open to what they say; begin a new, frightening project; make different friends.

There’s a million ways to challenge time’s passing without spitting in its eye. So as I’ve often said: Do what makes you feel more vital physically (I know I do and will!) but don’t neglect that super important mind’s eye perspective of yours. Because the reality is – time IS passing. Life as we apparently know it is finite. Live well. Live now.